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Ayla was united again with her parents and siblings

Finally! After many years of separation, Ayla was united again with her parents and siblings!

Ayla, an afghanish child, came to Germany at the age of ten years as an unaccompanied youth. The circumstances forced her parents and siblings to settle down in Greece.

To be part of Ayla’s life and to take action in her education and upbringing the parents were in a daily contact with Ayla over using the internet. Ayla as an underage lived here in a assisted living group while waiting for the entry of here parents and siblings to Germany.

At least it took six years before the family was reunited again. Through the years we had several FGC with different topics with reference to Ayla’s development. Therefore her parents in greece, her grandma in Chemnitz, her uncle and aunt in Stuttgart and several cousins took part in the FGC, that was held online to connect them all and discuss the furtherand best way for Ayla`s future.

There were also discussions, how to raise an aghan girl in a western community with its own standards and values. Even though it was different, the whole family made good plans and decisions for and with Ayla even though that meant, that they had to find compromises for many issues.

Shortly before the last FGC the parents canceled the appointment and we were surprised about this because they were always very reliable and accessible. A few days later we got the message, that the parents and siblings of Ayla arrived in Germany.

They seek shelter in a asylum home and they wanted Banafshe so badly to live with them to rebuild the familiar connections and to be in touch with her. So it was held another FGC to make a plan, how to make the transition from the assisted living home Ayla was living in to a regular life with the parents. In this last FGC Banafshe was also able to talk about several fears because of the cultural differences and the cultural expectations between Banafshe and her parents.

As I met them again, they were really happy about how fast they got used to each other again. The parents were and are full of patience und understanding for Ayla so it was easy to integrate her again in her origin family.

The whole family has two social workers who support the parents to integrate, take language courses and so on. By doing this they take off so much responsibility from Ayla because right now she is the only one who is able to communicate in german. So both social workers try to avoid, that Ayla will be the family manager in to be overextended with this role because of her age and her school matters.

Ayla is now in the age of 17 and she told me, that even though she is living in simplier and not so comfortable circumstandes in the asyl home she is much more better even mentally because she is with her parents and siblings now and for her, nothing can replace that.

It was heart touching to see Ayla suffering all this years without her family but finally it took a happyend for all of them as they live together again for about one year now.

The FGC helped them to keep in touch and to be in contact with each other and to take part of each others life and make plans and good decisions even though they were seperated for a long time from each other.

A story from Germany